While Janica Was Sleeping

So today was another not-so-fun day at Primary Children's Medical Center. Well I guess it started out fun, but didn't really end up that way. We went today for Janica's MRI of her spinal cord and for those of you who aren't familiar with MRIs, I will explain it to you a little bit.

An MRI is a way to see inside the body without cutting it open. Unlike an x-ray, an MRI shows muscle as well as bones. The machine is a giant magnet, and it is very important that the person who is in the MRI doesn't move. At all. Otherwise, I guess they can't get a good picture. My little Janica is five, and like most five year olds, can't stay still unless asleep. Almost a drugged sleep. No, scratch that. She needs to be in a drugged sleep to stay still. And drugged she was! The nurse put the sedative in her i.v., Jason asked how long it would take to kick in, and Janica was asleep. It really was that fast!

Once again, it was really fun two hours later to watch her in a drugged stupor. This time, I tried to be more clever and I actually took the video camera to the hospital so I could have evidence. The video is both cute and funny. I may post it later. Sadly, right now I'm not in the mood.

What happened to make me not want to share the cuteness of my children with one and all? It was what came next. We took the results from the MRI and went to see the neurosurgeon. He looked at the MRI and the results of the bladder test we did last month, and advised us that surgery is the best course of action. It isn't a sure thing to solve her bladder problems, but it is the best place to start. Based on the research Jason and I have done, we agreed. Timing is important since Janica's condition can cause her nerves to deteriorate and once the nerves are gone, they don't grow back, so we want the surgery sooner than later. How sooner? Monday.

So there it is. Janica fell back asleep during the neurosurgeon appointment and missed the decision - not that she would have had input anyway. My heart is heavy and while I agree that surgery is the best way to go right now, it is difficult to give my little girl away for a couple of hours, knowing her spine is being exposed and that there are all kinds of dangers involved. I will be in the hospital with her next week so there may or may not be any posts. It will depend on how things go. I realize that there are also many things that need to be done before then. Can Jason take the week off work? What about our other two children? How will we care for them and give them the attention they deserve? How will we pull it all together by Monday? I really don't know.

Sorry to be so down. I'm trying to end on a positive note, but it is hard to find one. Please pray for us.